Reclining

At one point in Western literary history, it was commonly understood that no serious writing could be undertaken if the author found him/herself in a “reclining” position. Supposedly Proust paid no heed to this convention and wrote both lying down and bedecked in “bedclothes.” In that spirit and in the comfort of my soft cotton pajamas in my rather remarkably comfy bed from the discount mattress store I offer you my musings on rest, presence and the ego.
I have recently begun the practice of mindfulness meditation. What is this? I’m not entirely sure, but I think it has something to with chilling the hell out. It is about breathing, and becoming present with what you are doing, right now. Sounds easy huh? If you have experimented with meditation you have perhaps experienced how challenge being present in the moment is. Thought about the future, thought about the past, thought about sensation, angry feeling, sad feeling etc. You get the picture. If you have never “meditated” here is an exercise for you. Next time you are doing the dishes, (folding the clothes, walking the dog, performing brain surgery etc.) turn off the radio and turn off the radio in your head. Feel the warm water oozing over your hands, see the beautiful soap suds grow as it merges with the water, hear the trickle of water as it makes it’s journey through the sink. Do not have an opinion about any of these things, just experience them happening. Do not think about the future or the past. Become still inside and experience the universe inside you. Good luck. It is definitely more difficult than it sounds.
The difficulty of course lies within the ego- the mysterious title for all the thoughts and forms we attach our infinite selves to. “I am this or that and this and that belong to me.” We don’t need to look any further than our own distracted and disconnected culture to realize that we are all worshipers of the ego. We base so much of our value and worth on our external reality (jobs, money, status) while allowing our imagination, creativity, and inner peace to wither and die.
Within the last year three real estate developers from my small town of Bend Oregon took their own lives when the real estate market started on it’s inevitable down turn. Where were their minds on that beautiful Bend day? The Ponderosa trees and soft white snow falling upon them, the Deschutes River as it meanders through the center of town, the hug of their loved one, the taste of the fresh mountain air they were breathing. Unfortunately they must have been so identified with their possessions and status that the simple pleasure of living was no longer palatable. They forgot that they are so much more than black and red numbers on paper.
In Eckhart Tolle’s book, "A New Earth", he relates a story about an Indian spiritual teacher by the name of J. Krishnamurti, a spiritual master, and in my mind an anarchist (the only way to be a master). (Krishnamurti’s first action as a newly elected leader of the Theosophical Society, was to declare the society as problematic and unnecessary. Then he left it).
Tolle explains how Krishnamurti, in his later life was speaking to a large group of his students, some of whom had heard his message for many years and yet still had not grasped its meaning. He said, “Do you want to know my secret?” Everyone in the audience became very attentive. Krishnamurti explained, “I don’t mind what happens.”
From this place life can start to be truly lived and experienced without the regret of the past or the anxiety of the future. We can embrace our creativity and REST, letting go of our rigid need to produce something or “become” someone. We are already more miraculous and wonderful than that image of success that we hold in our mind’s eye. So go ahead…break convention. Write your novel “reclining,” read Rumi in the middle of the day, let the sun shine on your face (it is a truly economical activity), care for your child, play with your dog. But REALLY do it, REALLY be there, breathing in, breathing out, taste the moment. For “this too shall pass”-and when the next unforeseeable moment arrives you will be ready to embrace that moment as well; with open arms, open mind, open heart.